Hedge Fund Disaster
You have one new voicemail, if you would lik…
[BEEEEP]
Listen up, you know who THIS is. First thing Ms. Wolfe’s portfolio was hacked by a black hat coder, posing as a White hat instructor and used her and others to gain insider information on the diamond market. Unfortunately the coder is now C+A+D, so we can’t turn that investing material over to the G-Fund group or else SAVIOR LLC. would have corrected the market like we did for COL. Abrahms, beneficial to SAVIOR LLC., but a friendly investor, part of the Smith & Wesson trading group, lost his trading license, acceptable though given the circumstances. SECOND, SAVIOR LLC. is now a fully licensed and bonded professional market trading group and all of them are on-board with commingling of funds with Ace Tomato Company, even the former trainee of the Traders Training Creche is on-board for now. So if management still insists on sending a Hedge Fund manager, remind them of my investing skills and the profits I am capable of attaining, either for ATC or for myself, and tell them to send the whole Hedge Fund Branch if they want to pull my trading license.
Well, if you are still listening, I at least have a possible return of the capitol I was entrusted with. The aforementioned Black Hat Coder had some serious skills, again unfortunate he is no longer able to interface with servers; however, two of his other hacked portfolios may be good candidates for the Traders Training Creche or at least could give some market indicators for the particular coding and hacking skills used to gain access to their portfolios. There are two others, but as of yet, I’ve been unable to gain knowledge of their portfolio potential, I will keep working on that. As for the first two, their information was forwarded to HR in the usual manner.
Still listening, well good, I think. Hedge fund managers could have pulled my license by the time you hear this for all I know. Anyway, the E.T. experimental department may have an interest in what Doc Brown has found out about why the tunnels used for Interstellar Investments has been blocked. A group of Naturalists (unknown which market they invest in) has setup a protest of some fashion which lead to the blocking of the investment tunnels. SAVIOR went down to the Southern Iceberg Lettuce market to break up their protest. SAVIOR was successful, even without my assistance, I will explain what I mean in a moment, but Doc Brown still has to finish analyzing the results of the blockage and if it can be cleared. Also, the ET department may be interested to know that while we traveled to the iceberg market, we spotted some potential first time visitors. I also sent that information to HR along with the info on the two candidates.
As to why SAVIOR didn’t have any help from me in the hostile take over bid of the Naturalists, I’ve been delving into my newly acquired skills in the Derivatives market and Futures market. While we were at the Iceberg Lettuce market, I was overwhelmed by a trading trend and was unable to participate in the lettuce market. I did turn quite the profit in the Derivatives & Futures market though. It seems the naturalists have been planning this protest for quite some time. Going back to the days when Mr. OutrĂ© Gyrene was working for Ace Tomato. The result of my delving into those markets showed a surreal trend of the Naturalists. They are planning an even bigger protest, and I mean MASSIVE, to be held at the Centurion Plaza Market. I’m unsure of the exact timing of this protest against our entire capitalist system, but I feel it could be very soon. This protest could crash every market and investment tunnel around the Globe if not stopped. R&D will have to conduct further market analysis to give a better trend timeline then I am capable of determining. I’m tracking some of the Naturalists and will be using my derivative and futures market training to get a lead on their short selling strategies before the planned protest. Some possible good news, we have an inside trader, Mr. Wyatt Ferris, [#WyattNPC]. He seems to have commingled his funds with one of the Naturalists and could be used to gain more capitol for the takeover bid of the Naturalists. They still see him as an outside trader as well.
Final thoughts of worthiness: Mrs. Castlehawke and Doc Brown have quite the history, it seems She recalls terminating his trading license, yet here he is as an independent R&D contractor for SAVIOR LLC.
[BEEEEP]
4 Replies to “Hedge Fund Disaster”
“and tell them to send the whole Hedge Fund Branch if they want to pull my trading license.” God DAMN I loved this whole bit!
IT IS AWESOME!!! Tell ’em what for!
Mrs. Castlehawke fully approves this missive
BP (read SAVIOR) may be fucked, but I figured Go Big or Fucking Go Home!